It’s been one of those months when everyone near me needs things and either: I have no needs, I have forgotten to need them or I am too tired to think about needing them because there is no time or space for them. I don’t want to get pissed about it so I’m subliminally rejecting needy thoughts before they get to the surface…because I am cool, fine, okey-dokey and life (apart from one thing) is pretty damn fine (no, two things…).
Anyway, my dad is finally out of nut ward and back in his own home, looking amazingly normal. Drugs are wonderful things. I am way into the tough love thing with him and have reached the point of saying (not quite to his face, but to anyone else who listens) that if he can’t stand on his own two feet well, I’m not propping him up anymore. No daily call or visit, no grocery run, no endless head nods and murmured sympathies over imaginary ills and woes. Nah! He’s a grown up and he either sorts his shit out or gets himself into a rest home where someone is paid to sort it. NOT MY JOB! Yaah for caring daughters, not.
My daughter has not stopped coughing for six weeks. And this isn’t a wee cough or a tickle or even a bark every now and then. It is a constant every breath cough. To the point the last few days that she has been getting pins and needles up her arms and over her face as a result of a lack of/excess (?) of oxygen. She is currently using a local anesthetic via a nebuliser every 4 hours. This numbs her mouth and throat and gives her 90 minutes relief from coughing. All she has done for the past three weeks is cough and sleep. She is exhausted and nothing else has worked. No cough mix, no inhaler and the chest x-ray is clear. But is just goes on, and on, and on.
She is in the middle of school exams and has to sit in a room alone to do them, as she is too distracting for the other girls. This morning she sat in the sick room numbing her throat (which also means no food or drink for 3 hours as she can’t swallow in case it goes into her lungs!) so that she could deliver her English speech! Madness. The doctor is stumped and I think we will be off to a respiratory specialist early next week.
The only bright spot for me this week is that I am going to buy a pair of boots tonight on my way to work (ugh, yes I work on a Friday night!). I have what is politely called a pair of ‘well developed calves’ (WDC) or just plain fat legs really! Darling husband says they are athlete’s legs and this is true. I have run many a mile to get them in this shape, but that is no consolation when sitting in a shoe shop red-faced with embarrassment and exhaustion from trying on multiple pairs of knee high boots that just will not bloody do up! So I have ordered in some specially made for ladies with ‘WDC’ and hope to pick them up in about 30 minutes. Just black I fear, and flat heeled, but I want to wear them everyday to work. They look vaguely like biker boots as they have buckles on the side where the gusset is that allows me to fit the damn things. I hope they are as comfortable as the ones I tried on before ordering them in…
Friday, June 01, 2007
Friday, May 25, 2007
Intimacy issues
You know you have intimacy problems when you get really, really, really, shitty at your husband for taking music off a new CD and not asking if it was OK.
His response to my curt “Shouldn’t you ask before you take that?” Was, “Take what?” “My music.” “Since when is it yours and not ours?” he asks patiently. “Since always!” was my snappy comeback.
I am totally pathetic – but it IS mine and I DON'T like sharing!
His response to my curt “Shouldn’t you ask before you take that?” Was, “Take what?” “My music.” “Since when is it yours and not ours?” he asks patiently. “Since always!” was my snappy comeback.
I am totally pathetic – but it IS mine and I DON'T like sharing!
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Snip snip
Snippets today…
• Baby-sat Phoebe today, for eight hours. Exhausting! She’s seven months old and perfect in everyway, but such a lot of work – and my back!
• Took my father out of his, seemingly permanent, residence in the psych ward for a quick trip to a barbershop and then to a shoe shop for slippers (his are wearing out, funny enough). This was almost as exhausting as babysitting Phoebe - which I was doing simultaneously. I had to put on his seat belt, and he shuffles so slowly that I think Phoebe would beat him just rolling along (she’s not crawling yet – she would win hands down then).
• Visited my Aunty Val, taking Phoebe to show her off! Was forced to eat a piece of fudge that I didn’t need.
• Had six people home (Phoebe’s home) for lunch, who only came because I was there. This including both husbands! Sausage rolls and pancakes – weird food, but all that was there.
• Missed a karate class because husband was at a lecture, one son was at ice hockey, one son at rugby practice and we just ran out of transport options.
• Gave my daughter a glass of Port today after school in my everlasting efforts to find something to curb her whooping cough. We are into the fifth week of what is expected to be a 12-16 week cough. Poor Zoë is exhausted and I am frustrated that nothing works. We are all so tired of her coughing. I timed her today and she coughs 8-10 time a minute!
• Ate an entire bag of chips while feeding Phoebe.
If this seems to be all about Phoebe – well it is – I am a besotted God Mother :-)
• Baby-sat Phoebe today, for eight hours. Exhausting! She’s seven months old and perfect in everyway, but such a lot of work – and my back!
• Took my father out of his, seemingly permanent, residence in the psych ward for a quick trip to a barbershop and then to a shoe shop for slippers (his are wearing out, funny enough). This was almost as exhausting as babysitting Phoebe - which I was doing simultaneously. I had to put on his seat belt, and he shuffles so slowly that I think Phoebe would beat him just rolling along (she’s not crawling yet – she would win hands down then).
• Visited my Aunty Val, taking Phoebe to show her off! Was forced to eat a piece of fudge that I didn’t need.
• Had six people home (Phoebe’s home) for lunch, who only came because I was there. This including both husbands! Sausage rolls and pancakes – weird food, but all that was there.
• Missed a karate class because husband was at a lecture, one son was at ice hockey, one son at rugby practice and we just ran out of transport options.
• Gave my daughter a glass of Port today after school in my everlasting efforts to find something to curb her whooping cough. We are into the fifth week of what is expected to be a 12-16 week cough. Poor Zoë is exhausted and I am frustrated that nothing works. We are all so tired of her coughing. I timed her today and she coughs 8-10 time a minute!
• Ate an entire bag of chips while feeding Phoebe.
If this seems to be all about Phoebe – well it is – I am a besotted God Mother :-)
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Marae Visit
We learnt a new song ‘E rere te manu’ and a couple of haka ‘Hau kiwi’ and ‘Tenei te ruru’, went for walks, ate and slept. The fantastic weather meant that we were able to have all of our practices in front of the wharenui (meeting house).
The sleeping arrangements were rows of mattresses lined up in the wharenui and anyone sleeps anywhere. The children looked like a big heap of puppies playing, laughing and reading before they settled down for the night.
There was a compulsory performance at night. I got away lightly with singing a chorus to one of Seán’s Gaelic song ‘An poc ar buile’ while Jack showed off a few of his new karate moves. Others sung, told stories and showed string games.
Seán’s parents had a great time and fitted in well. Kaumatua (elders) are very respected in the Maori world and they were always included and deferred too. They got special beds raised up of the floor and chairs were always brought out for them while we were lounging on the floor. They were not excluded from the performance either and come up with an Irish blessing they had sung at our wedding.
The Otakou Marae is situated at the end of the Otago peninsula and commands a glorious view of the harbour entrance.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Dull old week in Dunners
Just so little happening, work is busy but life isn’t. My life is taken up with lots of crappola, but just nothing to get excited about.
My father is back in hospital. He’s been in, out, in and then to a rest home and then back into the psych. ward over the last five months. My brother is over from Australia this week so we are having a family conference this afternoon, with the doctors, to see what can be done with a depressed old man. I am so tired of it/him and there seems to be no light at the end of this particular tunnel.
My parents-in-law are down for the weekend arriving tomorrow. They are the same age as dad, but fit and healthy. What they don’t know is that they are going to be staying on a marae with us overnight on Saturday! Our waiata (singing) group is going to learn a few new songs and by staying at Otakou Marae we will be infused with Maori culture and hopefully the songs will have more meaning for us.
My father is back in hospital. He’s been in, out, in and then to a rest home and then back into the psych. ward over the last five months. My brother is over from Australia this week so we are having a family conference this afternoon, with the doctors, to see what can be done with a depressed old man. I am so tired of it/him and there seems to be no light at the end of this particular tunnel.
My parents-in-law are down for the weekend arriving tomorrow. They are the same age as dad, but fit and healthy. What they don’t know is that they are going to be staying on a marae with us overnight on Saturday! Our waiata (singing) group is going to learn a few new songs and by staying at Otakou Marae we will be infused with Maori culture and hopefully the songs will have more meaning for us.
Friday, May 04, 2007
It's not easy being green...
I'm at the back - 4th from the left - still in yellow :-)
What’s to say? Very, very pleased it is over. I don’t think it was actually harder than my 5th kyu grading but I was far more nervous about it all. Nights spent doing kata, kihon, yakusoku and self defenses in my head (which is really tricky!) It took about 2 1/2 hours. No one was grading above us so we (the four going for 4th kyu) were the last on the floor.
I was pleased to arrive home to a hot bubble bath, but I must remember to stretch next time. Really sore legs for about three days: Odd muscles that got heavily used in the fitness and cardio routines rather than in karate. Made walking for the next few days a bit of a challenge.
That was my last grading with no fighting required. I am now a green belt and from here on in there will always be sparring at the end of each grading. I attended my first official sparring class last night and it’s not so much fun having them hit back at you. I got a couple of kicks to the head that made my ears pop and my jaw still can’t chew hard on one side. I have bruising on my knees, upper arms and chest. My back is sore and I feel quite fragile. This was an easy class (“Don’t hurt the new green belts, we don’t want to frighten them off”). Whew! I worry that I might burst into tears if I get hurt too much :-s
I got told off for; hitting too hard (It’s about technique not strength), not kicking hard enough, for being hit in the head (I wasn’t blocking) and for grabbing a kick (I wouldn’t have been able to if they weren’t being ‘gentle’) I can’t seem to win – not that it’s about winning. Sigh, it’s the first class though. So I’ll have to suck it up, keep my mouth shut, my guard up and try not to cry.
Seido Dunedin - Those that graded and some of those who watched. I'm at the back 4th from the right. My son, Jack, my husband, Seán, my daughter, Zoë, my step-son, Joseph, and my step-daughter, Lorna, are all in the picture as well. Another son, Jed, was at the grading but had to rush off to rugby before the pix was taken.
Mini break
On top of Mount IronI’m just back from a four-day mini break up around Central Otago. We stayed two nights in Wanaka at a spa pool complex. There were seven pools (apparently all different temperatures) set in an outdoor area with an additional two swimming pools. It was heaven for my sore legs (karate – another story). We had several sessions in the pools, day, night – even in the rain at one point. I could only stay in the hot pools for about 10 minutes and then I have to cool off in the bigger pools.
Lake WanakaIt’s between seasons so the town was really relaxed and quiet. The autumn colours were fantastic and the weather mild and sunny. It was just such a luxury to have time to nothing and nothing to do in it. Wanaka is an area that I am very familiar with – lots of family holidays over the years – so now I can just visit with nothing more to do than stroll along the lake front, wander up a hill or two, sit and have a coffee with a book and a roaring fire and feel no pressure to have to explore or see and do anything. It was fabulous.
Lake WanakaWe spent another night over the hills in Queenstown. It was misty and grey most of the time here, but we found warm spots to sit and relax in. It became a necessity for a place to have an open fire before we would go in. On Tuesday night I stopped for a port at a bar and the fire was so huge and so hot we could only sit in front of it for a few minutes before retreating to another chair. By Wednesday we had enlarged our requirements to needing; stone work, an open roaring fire, and a sofa that is well enough lit to read by (Hotel rooms are crap to read in!) We found the perfect spot for lunch in Clyde – an old Post Office that is now a café. It had all we wanted for that last wee luxurious time of eating, reading and coffeeing before heading home to the family.
Diamond Lake
Saturday, April 28, 2007
Arriving at work...
...is a little less exciting. A monstrosity built in the seventies (I think). It's pretty crap inside as well.
My entrance is in through the Lower basement - where the buses are parked.
It's dark and, as you can see, I walk past trash to enter my office.
The office is overrun with books - not too surprising, I suppose :-) And can you see the pipe running across the top? It drains some slight plumbing problem, further up the building, and when it rains you'd think there was a stream running through the place - or maybe a urinal?
My entrance is in through the Lower basement - where the buses are parked. 
It's dark and, as you can see, I walk past trash to enter my office.
The office is overrun with books - not too surprising, I suppose :-) And can you see the pipe running across the top? It drains some slight plumbing problem, further up the building, and when it rains you'd think there was a stream running through the place - or maybe a urinal? 
Friday, April 27, 2007
Walking to work
These are a few of the buildings that I walk past every day on my way to work. I have a ten-minute drive and then a ten-minute walk, right through the centre of Dunedin. It was a misty, chilly, autumn morning this morning. Coats required, but not hats and gloves yet.
Dunedin
Prison
Law Courts
Railway Station
St Paul's Cathedral
Town Hall
Dunedin Prison
Law Courts
Railway Station
St Paul's Cathedral
Town Hall
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
How high can you piss up a wall?
I have been in this house for seventeen years. My second son, Jed, was born a few months after moving in. This is our inbuilt height chart. The marks are ground into the wood with ball-point pen. I stopped letting the kids record me when they noticed a slight decrease in height – uh uhh I worked hard to get to my lofty 5’ 5 1/2”.
Jed has just topped 6” and is inordinately proud of it. So much so that he wound some insulation tape around the beam, and called it ‘The Jed Line’. I found this quite funny. Jed’s stepfather did not and was annoyed by it. He tops six foot too, so it wasn’t an inferiority thing. He thought it might ‘damage the wood’ and ‘make it hard to paint’. We all burst into hysterical laughter at this statement, seeing that it is ruined already and it NEVER gets painted. He was not amused.
Jed, being the most amenable member of this family, asks Seán if he wants him to take it down - this after me arguing for 5 minutes (on his behalf) that it should stay. Seán say 'Yes please' and Jed calmly unwinds it and puts in in the bin. This boy should join the UN.
Jed has just topped 6” and is inordinately proud of it. So much so that he wound some insulation tape around the beam, and called it ‘The Jed Line’. I found this quite funny. Jed’s stepfather did not and was annoyed by it. He tops six foot too, so it wasn’t an inferiority thing. He thought it might ‘damage the wood’ and ‘make it hard to paint’. We all burst into hysterical laughter at this statement, seeing that it is ruined already and it NEVER gets painted. He was not amused.
Jed, being the most amenable member of this family, asks Seán if he wants him to take it down - this after me arguing for 5 minutes (on his behalf) that it should stay. Seán say 'Yes please' and Jed calmly unwinds it and puts in in the bin. This boy should join the UN.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Rise and shiny
Friday, April 20, 2007
Librarian
Librarian by Haunted Love
This music video was shot in my library stack area and we were invited to its release a few weeks ago.
I have no qualms about being stereotyped when the result is as quirky as this.
Monday, April 16, 2007
Me Big Hunter Man!
Off all the times to have a mouse invasion, let’s wait for guests to arrive.
We always get about four mice a year, as the autumn weather turns chilly. The beasts annoy us for a couple of nights while we are in bed and then the traps come out. Four mice later and no more are seen.
But this year we can’t stop catching the wee buggers! Worse they are being seen in the daytime! Zipping under the fridge or the TV, crawling up the fire surround and darting across the woodpile. All this while we are entertaining guests. I felt like this was a third world country and our house was somehow attracting vast hoards of mice. I explained several times how this only occurs for about a week every year, but I don’t think they believed me.
The other odd thing is that Seán has taken such an active roll in the catching of them. It has usually been my job to catch and dispose of them. Especially the ones that get caught at night and aren’t quite dead yet. But this year Seán is setting the traps avidly and discussing bait and strategy with my son. He proudly shows each catch off and has piled up the corpses! Why? What’s wrong with the wheelie-bin? Get rid of them please….
Sunday, April 15, 2007
Julie visits Dunedin!
The lovely Julie came to visit us in Dunedin. A whistle-stop tour of 20 hours!
Larent, Pablo, Sophie, Julie, Melissa
I first met Julie last year via her blog southpacificsojourn. Seán and I were heading to New Caledonia for a holiday and on discovering Julie's blog, I asked her a few questions about what to expect in her Pacific wonderland. Once in Noumea we met up with Julie; husband Laurent, baby Pablo and daughter Sophie. We lunched (tuna steak :-)) on their balcony – feasting our eyes on this beautiful view.
Six months later they arrive, along with friend Melissa from LA, for 7 days in New Zealand. Dunedin was their last stop before flying home to the tropics. I think they may have underestimated how far south we really are down here, and were taken back with the chilly weather.
We picked them up from the airport about 10.30am and whisked them home for some lunch. Pablo had a nap, Julie relaxed with me (and a roaring fire), while Seán, Jack, Sophie, Laurent and Melissa went on a Cadbury chocolate factory tour and hit some shops for those last minute souvenirs.
We then zoomed around the Otago peninsula - our favourite playground. Unfortunately we were in the middle of a cold snap, so beach walks, penguin and seal spotting were all off the menu. We ended up at Tairoa head – the only mainland albatross breeding area in the world. The wind was howling,
(along with Pablo who has never experienced cold before!) but no albatross were flying. They have a nifty web cam link to a chick that hatched this year. Not much happens, but I keep looking hoping to spot the parents feeding it.
Back home for lamb chops, roast potatoes, etc, and then Seán took them all down to his museum for one of his special ‘behind the scenes’ tours. I stayed home and babysat a sleeping Pablo. Dessert/supper (including New Zealand’s iconic Pavlova) was served when they got home from the museum. A bit more of a chat and then everyone headed to bed.
They had three flights today to get them back to their wee slice of paradise. Laurent was apparently planning to be up at 5am tomorrow to go for a run!
It was lovely to have them here – my third ‘blogger’ friend to stay in our house! Just a shame the weather didn’t cooperate with our plans.
Delicious Pablo
Larent, Pablo, Sophie, Julie, MelissaI first met Julie last year via her blog southpacificsojourn. Seán and I were heading to New Caledonia for a holiday and on discovering Julie's blog, I asked her a few questions about what to expect in her Pacific wonderland. Once in Noumea we met up with Julie; husband Laurent, baby Pablo and daughter Sophie. We lunched (tuna steak :-)) on their balcony – feasting our eyes on this beautiful view.
Six months later they arrive, along with friend Melissa from LA, for 7 days in New Zealand. Dunedin was their last stop before flying home to the tropics. I think they may have underestimated how far south we really are down here, and were taken back with the chilly weather.
We picked them up from the airport about 10.30am and whisked them home for some lunch. Pablo had a nap, Julie relaxed with me (and a roaring fire), while Seán, Jack, Sophie, Laurent and Melissa went on a Cadbury chocolate factory tour and hit some shops for those last minute souvenirs.
We then zoomed around the Otago peninsula - our favourite playground. Unfortunately we were in the middle of a cold snap, so beach walks, penguin and seal spotting were all off the menu. We ended up at Tairoa head – the only mainland albatross breeding area in the world. The wind was howling,
(along with Pablo who has never experienced cold before!) but no albatross were flying. They have a nifty web cam link to a chick that hatched this year. Not much happens, but I keep looking hoping to spot the parents feeding it.Back home for lamb chops, roast potatoes, etc, and then Seán took them all down to his museum for one of his special ‘behind the scenes’ tours. I stayed home and babysat a sleeping Pablo. Dessert/supper (including New Zealand’s iconic Pavlova) was served when they got home from the museum. A bit more of a chat and then everyone headed to bed.
They had three flights today to get them back to their wee slice of paradise. Laurent was apparently planning to be up at 5am tomorrow to go for a run!
It was lovely to have them here – my third ‘blogger’ friend to stay in our house! Just a shame the weather didn’t cooperate with our plans.
Delicious Pablo
Friday, April 13, 2007
Days or dates?
We were actually married Easter Sunday 2004 which was April 11th. I now have two anniversary dates each year!
Darling Seán likes to celebrate our marriage on Easter Sunday, but I feel like there is enough going on that day; church, school holidays, etc and want to stick to the 'real' date.
So we have compromised, as one does, a meal with the family (kids) Easter Sunday and a meal out (the two of us) on the 11th.
April 11th won't fall on Easter Sunday again until 2066, I'll be 104 all going well :-)
Darling Seán likes to celebrate our marriage on Easter Sunday, but I feel like there is enough going on that day; church, school holidays, etc and want to stick to the 'real' date.
So we have compromised, as one does, a meal with the family (kids) Easter Sunday and a meal out (the two of us) on the 11th.
April 11th won't fall on Easter Sunday again until 2066, I'll be 104 all going well :-)
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Jack as Jesus
This is Jack in his school presentation of the Easter story. He was Jesus for the second year running – they must think he dies well.
Shocking photos. But it’s a record. It may be the very last time he ever gets to play Jesus – something I have never done :-)
'Snot so bad
I read that last post and it sounds so depressing. Life is, actually, not that bad. In fact 87% of the time it is great and I love my life. That's a pass isn't it? An A+ pass, in fact. So, it is a little annoying (to myself and everyone around me) that I allow the 13% of shitty times to infiltrate and taint the good bits.
As I have been told many times - build a bridge and get over it.
Seán, who no longer reads my blog, is such a lovely man. He is kind and gentle, honest and caring, he has a generosity of spirit that is unbelievable (he's very clever too and I like that in a man) - the shit that he has to put up with from me is amazing and yet he does. he forgives me my sins over, and over, and over, and over. I forget this at times.
I'm always looking back and thinking how I would have liked to have married him first and had a family together that would have avoided that 13% of conflict - which is mainly about differing parenting styles and standards. But it’s probably not true, and we would still have had arguments over sex and money and children - as you do. And, of course, my darling children would not be the wonderful people they are...
So, this year I resolve to enjoy my wedding anniversary - not treat it casually and as though it is nothing more than just another day. We had a fabulous wedding day - full of fun and laughter and such a lot of good wishes. It's time to let the past be the past, stop regretting choices made and remember that this is my life now and this is what I have and it is good.
"All shall be well, and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well"
As I have been told many times - build a bridge and get over it.
Seán, who no longer reads my blog, is such a lovely man. He is kind and gentle, honest and caring, he has a generosity of spirit that is unbelievable (he's very clever too and I like that in a man) - the shit that he has to put up with from me is amazing and yet he does. he forgives me my sins over, and over, and over, and over. I forget this at times.
I'm always looking back and thinking how I would have liked to have married him first and had a family together that would have avoided that 13% of conflict - which is mainly about differing parenting styles and standards. But it’s probably not true, and we would still have had arguments over sex and money and children - as you do. And, of course, my darling children would not be the wonderful people they are...
So, this year I resolve to enjoy my wedding anniversary - not treat it casually and as though it is nothing more than just another day. We had a fabulous wedding day - full of fun and laughter and such a lot of good wishes. It's time to let the past be the past, stop regretting choices made and remember that this is my life now and this is what I have and it is good.
"All shall be well, and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well"
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
Wicked Step Mother
I exist in one of those ghastly 'blended' families. It all began about three years ago when My Darling begged me to marry him. We had been in a relationship for over seven years and, by then, had had a child but still lived in separate houses. I ummed and ahhhed a bit - quite a bit - and then agreed. This meant that I gained three stepchildren. Grrr.
So, seven kids originally, the steps are here six days a fortnight, my three go to their dad’s every second weekend and darling Jack lives here all the time. We are down to five kids at home now; Sean’s eldest son is in Stuttgart having his OE (overseas experience) while my eldest went to live with his dad last year and is now in his second year at university.
So, Easter this year five are here and I will probably go slightly mad (again and again and again); too much chocolate, too much noise, just too, too, too much all together. Oh, and they all have two weeks of school holidays as of Good Friday -joy, oh, bloody joy…Double oh, I have a wedding anniversary to enjoy next week as well :-)
“Regrets, I have a few, but then again, too few to mention” (ha, ha, ha)
Monday, April 02, 2007
Good old Timmers
I seem to be busy these days; no time to post, no time to blog – plenty of time (in Jo’s weird time scheme) to read and eat, however J
We are just back from a lovely weekend in Timaru visiting Seán’s parents. I love them dearly. I wish they were mine and it would, I think, be nice to grow up and be them. Perfect people, really.
Meet up with three of Seán’s four sisters, one brother-in-law and a couple of nephews as well. As is always the case there are a couple of ‘awkward’ bodies amongst this lot. More awkward than me (I think and hope?), which is saying something! But the good way out weighs the bad in this family. It makes my family look like cardboard cutouts and after visiting I always wonder how I would have turned out if I had been a child in that house?
My father is still battling his depression, or rather sinking further into the mire. It’s so hard to remain positive in the face of his overwhelming helplessness and childlike behaviour. I am tired of him.
I am also tired of my sore knee. I had thought it was coming right, but the last few days it has been achy and has sharp pains in it. I haven’t run for a week and am not inclined to, but need to for my base fitness. Karate grading is at the end of April – 4 weeks! Must run, must run!
We are just back from a lovely weekend in Timaru visiting Seán’s parents. I love them dearly. I wish they were mine and it would, I think, be nice to grow up and be them. Perfect people, really.
Meet up with three of Seán’s four sisters, one brother-in-law and a couple of nephews as well. As is always the case there are a couple of ‘awkward’ bodies amongst this lot. More awkward than me (I think and hope?), which is saying something! But the good way out weighs the bad in this family. It makes my family look like cardboard cutouts and after visiting I always wonder how I would have turned out if I had been a child in that house?
My father is still battling his depression, or rather sinking further into the mire. It’s so hard to remain positive in the face of his overwhelming helplessness and childlike behaviour. I am tired of him.
I am also tired of my sore knee. I had thought it was coming right, but the last few days it has been achy and has sharp pains in it. I haven’t run for a week and am not inclined to, but need to for my base fitness. Karate grading is at the end of April – 4 weeks! Must run, must run!
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